How 2011 Made Me.

As I am typing this new post, I can't help to smile with every steps I made last year. Those times, I tried, experienced something for the first time, and the lessons I treasured from them. Observing myself, I never thought I can be this “Patricia” that evolved to something more mature, stronger and a better one.

2011 became my 5k running marathon, given me the chance to run all through times of enjoyment, tiredness, thirst, falling out, having a bruise, learning to stand up and finally surpassing that finish line. I often asked myself, why not do it? Try new things, as it may turn out well, or maybe not but at least you will learn something.

First things first? I colored my hair for the first time in late January. Out of curiousity, then it turned out to be a failure. Then colored it again that fortunately resulted good. I tried to groom my jungle eyebrows, which I disobyed my mother when she told us never to touch blade nor a tweezor and try fixing our eyebrows. (but, thread was used on my eyebrows mother. HAHA!). I became semi anorexic/bulimic during this year. I struggled to achieved that body. I usually strave myself, then binge eating, drank teas to make me defecate (but I am constipated FYI), and what's worse? I even tried purging (which I never will try again, seriously I felt my body is struggling during that event). Thankfully I surpass all of these, but I can't cancel the tea (constipation gets on my nerves everytime, sorry to say that). I tried something else to loosen these fats, learned how to avoid unhealthy foods little by little, include sit-ups in my everyday, and seriously drinking A LOT of water. Fortunately I became more confident in my weight today, and blushing everytime people will give compliments about loosing those pounds. AMEN to that! :)

Second. I met new faces, that ended up now my close friends. They been there for me ever since, enjoyed each others company and finally unleashing my hidden personality within me. They became my family, treated them as my real siblings, that never fail in giving joy and laughter to me. I can't enumerate them all, but as a whole, I am much thankful to you guys, that God had given me the chance to met all of you, that you imparted me with such experiences that built me. I love you so much guys. My BT family, my Lasallian friends, Condo group, Psych friends, CB31, CB27, my “babies, babes, bebes”, B08, B07 (I hope I didn't forget someone, so I'll just left it with no period nor an and).

Third. I struggled to the word love. I fallen in love, got hurt, cried, been broken. But no regrets, it made me to be this stronger one. Struggled it may seems, but honestly, falling in love with a person will be like in a room full of chocolates, never failing you to feel that comfort and happiness in every bite of that bar of chocolate. I never been an expert in these things, a late bloomer here, sorry. But, I guess if you two are not for each other, reality calls you will be separated and belong to someone else. Thankfully, I moved on. So for that person, I still can recall those times but seriously I forgiven you, and hoping for your best. Maybe I am unlucky as may seem. Meet another one, but why it can't it be all the person you like will be openly available? Thought I can enter that line, but as a respect and an advice by a friend, I ignored that possibilty and chance, because it will not be that worth it, so better yet let that line to be strong and keep on multiplying everytime. And there's someone I find to be just a friend, but blabbing those words makes me smile (I seriously don't no why?), and having that someone that you can talk to. But I don't know, I can still meet someone, maybe the right one, but we still can't assume. Cupid will just be hitting you in that right time. Crossing fingers here now. <3 But, still I learned, which I'm very thankful to. So I guess, learning from experience is now my motto. HAHA!

Fourth. I felt the selfless love of my family. One experience I will seriously never can forget. That unforgetable night that enlighten me how lucky I am to have my parents, to have them to take responsibility of me, to love me and to built me. I am out of words in describing here, but I still can feel that goosebumps every time I remember that night. That night that lead us to a better family, not better actually but the best. HAHA! I love you so much God, I never thought you had given me such parents and that family that will love me this big. (Sorry, but I am teary-eyed here) Thank you Papa and Mama. You both are simply the best! Two my siblings, I will never get tired of loving you two.

Fifth. I kept that distant, but I will make it up to it. This 2011, God became my outlet of talking to my times of downfall. But after, forget about talking to Him in a daily basis, as I used to. So, a big YES for me this 2012, is to be closer to Him, never get tired of praying and talking to him, appreciating all of the things He had blessed you, and asking for repentance for those times, I find myself lost to the right path. I know I made a mistake before, but another year for me to make it up to those times I losing my way, and just walk alone without Him. I will not promise, but I will make it as a habit, talking to God, will not just take your sorrows away, but instead will heal you and make you whole as a person. Feed your spiritual side, it will not be difficult if you have that eagerness to reach for His hand and join Him in His journey. :)

As I end this post, 2011 you will be remembered I promise. Not only you gave me learnings, but you gave me this more improve “Patty”, that will keep on growing as time pass by. Thank you, for passing by in my life, I may fall but will keep continuing my running until I reach that goal.